*Disclaimer: I am not married so this is not a personal story. This post is also not meant to shame anyone who has married young. I respect everyone's opinions however, this is my opinion.*
I am now 20 years old and as far as I know, no one who was in my grade at school is married or even engaged. This isn't surprising to me as none of us ever seemed to be likely to marry at a very young age. There have been a few people I went to school who are now parents but these people are not married. This isn't to say that some of the "high school sweethearts" from my school aren't still together. In fact, many are still together and going strong which makes me really proud and happy. I often ask my friends from high school "Who do you think will get married first out of everyone in our year level?" and the answer frequently changes. Sometimes we say it'll be the trashy, "damaged" girl who sleeps with guys to get the attention she didn't get as a child. Sometimes we'll say it's the couple that have been together since they were 15 years old and are still going strong today. Any day now, we could find out that someone we grew up with, is joining themselves with another person in the eyes of the law and that they will be celebrating their deepest commitment to them.
While marriage is a terrific and magical thing, marrying young (let's say in our late teens to early 20's) doesn't seem the smartest move to make in my opinion. Here's why...
1. You barely even know who you are as an individual so how are you going to figure that out when all of your time is taken up with being a couple.
2. It seems like an excuse to avoid being independent and grow up in the real world.
3. At this age, you don't really know what you want or what you will want in the future. The person you're with now may seem perfect for you but as you grow up and discover yourself (see point 1), you may find that you want something, and someone completely different. Why go through the heartache of a divorce?
4. You barely have any experience with other people. This may very well be your first relationship. While this isn't a huge problem, it can turn into one. For example, if you haven't been in any previous relationships, it will be very hard for you to determine whether your relationship is healthy or not. You will probably think your partner looking through your phone is normal or that telling your partner they cannot hang out with their opposite sex friends without you is perfectly fine, With experience, most people can see that these are bad habits and warning signs that you are in an unhealthy relationship.
5. Being married will require A LOT of sacrifice. I'm not talking just compromise. You may have to put a hold on your own dreams while your partner goes off and achieves theirs. Maybe they want to finish their degree but cannot do it without you working full time to support the two of them. Maybe they need to move away for their dream job and they only way you can be together is if you get up and move away from your family. Are you willing to give up what you want to fulfill their dreams?
6. Lack of life experience, maturity and social intelligence. Okay so you might think you're super mature but how many people do you know who think they're mature but really have the brain of a 6 year old drinking red cordial? What's to say that that isn't you? You've probably grown up in a small town where you met your partner at 16 years old. You've been together ever since and haven't seen a lot of the world, nor have you been through a lot. Okay maybe you have, but maybe you've decided to get married to find some sense of stability. This is a sign of immaturity. Marriage shouldn't be something you do to find stability. You should be creating your own stability within yourself and when you do find it, share it with someone else.
Many young couples come from highly religious/ faith-based backgrounds where they've attended church their entire lives. They've probably seen everyone around them marry young. They might feel the need to stick to this norm or even believe that this is the norm within society. I've seen people like this who fit every single one of my previous points and all I want to do is shake some sense into them and shout "What the fuck is wrong with you?"
Anyway, that's my two cents worth.